Bazza's Adventure: Part Two

This is PART TWO of Bazza's Adventure. Make sure you've read the incredible Part 1!

Read the adventures and then watch the series! Coming late 2010! 

So there I was, stuck in the middle of nowhere with only my extraordinary survival skills and enough strength to do pushups with just my morning wood. I had just eaten that delicious but endangered animal and had left the bones for my handsome cameraman Benny to chew on. Now it was time to keep trekking to the coastline, the Great Australian Megabyte.

Bazza's Adventure: Part One

Alright legends, time to tell you about Sir Baz's last adventure. As you know, I was dropped from a rocket from the outer atmosphere with an unfinished parachute. Any other average bloke would've fallen to his death but I had my handy sewing kit with me and stitched up all the holes whilst in freefall. Landing on a huge pile of soft manure helped save me too. This also helped me hide the fact I had soiled myself a little bit.

Help Feed Starving Children

Hi everyone,

Nothing pisses me off more than starving, impoverished children. No, it's not the children themselves that annoy me, it's the fact that they're hungry, malnourished and starving. It's the fact that I (and I'm sure most of you) sit here and feast away on delicious chunks of animal and plant flesh and meanwhile there are just over a billion starving people in the world (according to the WFP website). You've witnessed how angry I can get over not much at all, so just imagine what I'd be like after seeing something so terrible! Stand back is all I'll say...

Anyway, how great would it be if we could all help them for FREE?!

Guess, what? You can dudes and dudettes! Through SocialVibe it's so easy to help a wide range of charities by just giving up a little bit of your time online.

Bazza's "Beached As" Photos

WARNING: The following photos may cause immense excitement and frustration. Excitement because Bazza is the man and you get to see him in action, and Frustration because the producers of Bazza vs. Wild are teasing you with it but making you wait a little bit longer for the footage. Easy tiger, before you know it all your dreams will come true and Bazza will be on the big screen. ;)

Bazza contemplating life as a gypsy

Bazza Is Rescued!

Hi all,

Bazza here. I heard a rumour going around that I was lost... That's just crazy talk! Me, lost? I think my producers have lost their minds. Clearly I was enjoying nature so much I decided to spend an extra week out there. My cameraman didn't like it so much. He'll be okay once he's out of the intensive care unit. I guess he wasn't used to eating snail-trails and animal turds as much as I am. And he didn't really ration his own supply of beef jerky too well. But hey, I'm not a babysitter. I offered him some of my urine/sweat/blood/fecal mix but he refused, and look where it put him!

Please Find Bazza

Another important message from Bazza vs. Wild management.

Bazza is still lost guys. It's been a sad and stressful week for us all. We've searched night and day but he could be anywhere by now, and we're almost ready to give up. We're holding onto the fact that his millions of fans/foes would love to help find him, and seeing as you've all learnt tracking skills from Bazza himself it should be a breeze.

So get out there and find him please...


Oh, I suppose we better give you a bit of an idea where to find him. Basically, there are some photos of Bazza somewhere else on the web. Just locate them and email us with the setting Bazza is in. He could be on a mountain, in a desert, floating in the ocean, on a roller-coaster etc. Just the setting is all we'll need to narrow down the search.


Please hurry. Bazza vs. Wild is depending on you to find him.


Bazza vs. Wild Management

Bazza's Lost!

This is an announcement from the producers of Bazza vs. Wild.

Dear readers of Bazza's blog,

It is with deep regret and excitement that we must inform you of Bazza's disappearance. He was meant to meet us 48 hours ago at the pickup location but he hasn't showed.

There's no need to panic, because although Bazza is a much loved and stalked celebrity, he has immense skills and abilities in the art of surviving. Can't say the same for the camera crew but hopefully they manage to get some brilliant footage before they perish.

Now for the exciting part... We figure we may as well take this not uncommon situation and get you guys involved by helping us find him! Later this week we'll post up more details on possible locations and whoever locates the little six-foot four-inch tacker will be rewarded...

Meanwhile, our search goes on for Cheeky Bazza. We've managed to spot an arrow he made out of logs and rocks but the silly idiot had just made a big circle. We're not too concerned for his welfare though - he once survived off just the breath of a Rhinoceros for two weeks.

Stay tuned.

Bazza vs. Wild Management